Fixation & The Matchmaker

The older I get, the less objections I seem to have to the phrase “All is One.”

As an extension of our last article: “What is natural?“, essentially all distortion can be traced directly back your distance from from God — from life — from people. From your “qualia” — your experience. Again, distance being a hide-and-seek game with your own will.

For the context of this article, what is “distortion?”

Distortion is most easily understood as fear, but manifests more as consumption (as in, the consumption or expiration of your experiential world), but it is technically whatever isolates you further within yourself and lengthens the time between your decisions and the execution of your will.

I use the term fixation rather than density, because it is easy to imagine yourself fixating on something — on focusing on something with intent. When you understand this idea of fixation, you can work backwards to connect yourself to the idea of the “world” you are experiencing before you. You can “broaden your horizons” knowing that you are the horizons.

Density is a little harder to convey, in my opinion. Density suggests a heaviness, which can be felt but easily missed. Density doesn’t relate you to your experience quite as well. I use the word fixation because it lets you sink your teeth into the idea through a simple exercise. Look closely at any object near you. Now, unfocus your gaze and take in as much of your room as possible.

When you are unfocused like this, do you feel different? I want you to note the feeling between the two perspectives. Do you see how you “exclude” the background when you are focused? And do you see how when you “broaden your horizons”, you include everything? This is similar to how you may have viewed the world when you were a child and closer to a “natural state.” Now use your imagination and see how you may “fixate” like this on other ideas, concepts or people beyond your sensory perceptions as well.

Here is another trick. If something requires more story, you can consider it to have a higher density or higher fixation.

When you become focused on the details rather than the canvas, you are practicing fixation. There is nothing wrong with fixation. Some level of fixation is needed. When you are concerned about granularity, or micromanaging, you are fixating. Fixation might be described as tension, like winding a cord up. It often correlates to fear. If you are concerned more with survival than living, you are fixating.

Life is “default” so you simply need to “get out of the way.” You do not need to “survive.” Survival is a choice of experience — a misuse of your will — seeing the forest as adversarial and something to conquer, rather than your salvation. A particular way that you are formulating your reality in order to experience lack, or a particular limitation. You are arbitrary dividing your scene and pretending it is not there or something that must be usurped or dominated, which simply causes the scene to control you instead.

Distortion — Nonsense / anti-life — will denial — God denial — life denial — begins with fixation.

Fixation is essentially “will denial.” While some some level of fixation is desirable, this article will focus on dysfunctional levels of fixation. Dysfunctional fixation results from being non-actualized, or not understanding that you are “part of the all.” Denial of your circumstances or choices because you are denying your part of the whole and so creating obstacles for you to challenge or compete with. It is not knowing yourself and reacting rather than intending. It is a rejection (ejection) of the Collective — of God — of the “silent observer/executive.”

Competing with yourself is not possible. Even if The Other possesses its own agency, that agency has been granted by you, and so functionally they are you, even if you value (and so willfully invest) the distinction and separation. So why are you competing with yourself? The well-being and function of The Other first depends on our pure belief and intention towards them. If it is distorted, then The Other will also be distorted.

You do not think you are in control of agency? No one can make you do anything against your will. If you believe the destruction of your scene represents “you”, you are still lost in fixation. If you believe your will can be taken, you also fundamentally believe you can take will from others — so you open yourself up to these possibilities. If you become defensive, or indignant about this idea, or want to counter with examples of violation of your will, you are victimizing yourself and that is the investment you are creating — so that is exactly what you will continue to experience.

If you create your own adversaries, they will happily take from you because that’s what you are seeing (creating). If you feel you must compete, you will create a world to satisfy this need. This does not make the participants any less real, because you also value the realness upon you, likely because in dysfunctional states of fixation, you have no idea what you are actually valuing.

You cannot create a “counter will.” All you do is destroy yourself — consume — to pretend that this is possible. And so reality will do its “best” to attempt to create a story that cannot exist — anti-will — which will be reflected back to you as conflict, consumption, and entropy.

As distortion rises, reality literally “breaks down” — as it in, it breaks into further pieces and contains “more complexity.” Again, to some degree, this is desirable. This is how we craft stories. As I spoke in the last article, as fixation increases, more technology is required to achieve the execution of will (“automation” which is anything but.) The technology acts as essentially a kind of egregor — a “daemonic (see programming language) spirit” or “magical” golem — whose job is keep your will farther and farther away from you to maintain the illusion that your will is not immediate. You think it is serving you, when it is really just acting as a sink for your will.

That’s a reminder, by the way, that your will is always immediate. You are living in a world where this is highly deceptive/concealed from you because of your level of fixation. If that makes you uncomfortable, then simply consider yourself as a conduit for God, or the divine, or God’s servants — it makes no informative difference.

You do not think your will is immediate? What is happening when you imagine? Your will is done. It is there. You are experiencing it. In the space you have pretended to hide away from yourself. That "black space" somewhere "up there."

Who told you that you are inside a brain? Did you have any experience of brains before someone gave you the idea? Or is the brain a story-byproduct of your level of fixation to explain your loss of will? How would you even know? Can you "jump outside" of your brain? Does handling someone else's grey matter prove you are inside yours?

Hmm.

You can easily detect changes in your own fixation which can help gauge your own level of consciousness development. Your predominant environment is highly indicative of your level of fixation because you cannot be extracted from your own scene. If you cannot snap your fingers and exit your environment, you are in a fixated realm and have no choice but to learn & master the rules, because they are your rules established by your cumulative decisions. No one can do this for you.

Your scene derives from “the entirety of you” so you are always at your “apex. ” So you “are” what you tolerate or wake up to everyday.

These are notable features that will appear in the world/realm in question –>

Now let us talk about THE MATCHMAKER.

In video games, a matchmaker assess certain values that belong to a “PLAYER” and then tries to find other players who possess similar values and put them together to “play” to create a fair playing ground. If you do not play video games, you may be familiar with ELO in Chess, or similar ranking mechanisms in other sports, which arranges matches based on an evaluation of a player’s skill.

The real world works exactly like this.

What are your “matchmaking variables?” They are essentially a kind of complex energetic signature that is an accumulation of your intention and the execution of your will. They are the “momentum of your willful investments.” Where your investments crossover with the investments of others creates a sort of “venn diagram” of reality.

They are not frequency or vibes, but let us briefly touch on those because they are extremely valuable systems in their own right that may help you and for all intents and purposes you can borrow those ideas to help you on your journey.

In some circles, this matching is thought to be done by one’s “frequency” because it is often correlated to the electromagnetic spectrum. In fact, in these circles, feelings & emotions are often associated with a scale where they are more or less “fixated.” This is why music feels a certain way — low tones feel broad, earthy, comforting or scary — and high tones are sharp and airy (also see chakras) — but this is simply the story that has been correlated over time. It is built after the fundamental nature of free will. It is a useful aperture — an interface. The emotion is before the frequency assignment.

Once you understand alchemy — turning lead to gold (which is describing something you can do in your mind, which will later show up the physical world) — frequency doesn’t cut it. This “mathematical” assignment of God’s paints is, in my opinion, a “less right” explanation and leads to what I call a One True Path problem.

You cannot unify God — life, your own will, the “scene”, and so on — if you are only allowed to paint with part of your canvas, but this does not mean every painting is coherent, or life-giving. Philosophy and spirituality is the intersection where we discover what is life-destroying versus life-affirming and God “learns” forever — as in whatever you know, God knows. You are always adding, essentially, to God’s glory or library even if you don’t speak to a soul.

What is alchemy? This is its own topic, but essentially alchemy is the process of rejecting the suggested reality, and substituting your own. You can’t do this unless you have an intimate understanding and belief of what is suggestive. If you believe something is not subject to your willful meddling, then it is not (not subject to it and becomes ‘fixed’ and no amount of substitution will work for you unless you address underlying principles.) As I often point out over and over, it should be emphasized that there are certain absolutes that cannot be violated even with alchemy unless you wish to bring extreme suffering upon yourself. And you cannot fake belief. There is a period of practice and integration.

A simple example of alchemy is turning one emotion into another like anxiety into excitement or anger into passion. You can gradually quiet a busy mind by replacing it with silence. More advanced forms are things like visualization. You visualize your ideal life and live within it before it “arrives.” You can use alchemy to gradually make substitutions that eventually settle into your fixated consciousness — your unconscious, your soul, or DNA.

Electromagnetism is a byproduct of more dense realities attempting to explain more fundamental universal mechanics which are based on raw will and “stories.” Would you ever use the color “red” in a painting if you thought it was evil, or bad? No, you would condemn yourself to a particular “band” of colors forgetting that the other colors exist — and exist for a reason.

Sometimes you need to use red and only red will do — but if you have permanently associated it with “always evil” what happens? Then you have created a “weight” for which the entire universe comes to service — a blackhole sucking everything towards it. You have created a hierarchy, because that’s what a blackhole is — a pyramid — a pit — and do you remember our chart above?

You have also created a place where you can be controlled & trapped because you have created holy cows, but I’ll leave that for another article.

Consider this color example when you impart weights to other areas of your life, not just in the physical, but in the mental as well. If they are out of balance, they will gradually suck you towards it and that's right -- create fixation. Before you know it a simple vice is now a demon (daemon -- automation) which rules your life.

Your feelings are perfect feedback mechanisms given to you by God. They are pure methods of navigation and superior in every way to words, or thought. If you introduce doubt or deception into these mechanisms — that is a choice you are making — you are severely screwing with yourself — excuse my language, but the emphasis is needed here.

If you assign a color code, for example, to the color blue, you may think that you are describing the spectrum from which blue is derived, but this is an inversion. Blue exists before your description. You are effectively trying to put a binding or curse on the color blue to control how it arrives to you. This is fixation — tantrum throwing — false control. Blue is already within you — you have no need to create “extra steps” for it to control it, or manipulate it into doing what you want.

If you wish to experience the color blue, it is done. It is there. It needs no additional explanation. To assign additional explanation is to agree to imbue your reality with additional complexity — fixation. It is that simple. Who else would be imposing that upon you except you? If you blame the world for being “the way it is” then you are fixating / disowning your will again and throwing a tantrum.

Take a moment to check out these excellent charts collected TALKNET –> https://talknet.substack.com/p/mapping-the-levels-of-consciousness <– These are highly insightful, useful and illuminating but demonstrate the subtle problem I describe here.

If you do not see blue, or red, or green “as themselves”, or similarly, peace, anger, or happiness as “themselves”, then you are giving those things a weight (a frequency or a number value, etc.) which immediately begins to impart a thrust/momentum/trajectory of story upon your universal canvas. It is different to favor a certain palette and another to insist that one palette is superior to another. If you are not careful, you will get swept away by your own creation. This is why I insist you cease thinking in terms of polarity or opposites. God is weightless.

Jesus & the empty cave, the Egyptians and the soul that is ‘light as a feather’, the Buddha and the middle path and so on.

Electromagnetism is just another philosophy used to produce a particular “brand” of reality. For book nerds out there, it is just another “magic system.” In my opinion and extremely restrictive one born from constant Stockholm Syndrome & bargaining with Nonsense (short: fear, the devil, separation, etc.) on a long enough time scale.

Have you heard the phrase “As Above, So Below?” This phrase is another way of expressing UNITY, or “All is One.” They are functionally indifferent. Your “perceived” reality extends in all directions for as far as you can imagine — so to the farthest corners of the universe, because there is nothing “outside” of you. “Where” would that be? It is complete Nonsense. As soon as you have imagined “outside”, you have created it. Can you “think of nothing?” Nope.

This is a clue you are immortal, by the way, if you pay attention.

Your ideas of people, places, “Earth” are all inside of you. Right there. You just thought about them. Where are they? Out there? Out there is “inside you” too. Your sense of being inside your body and the world outside of it is still inside of you. Are you getting it yet?

You are the center point (yes, as is everyone else — it takes time to understand “how” multiple perspectives can both exist, be absolute and not collide — but you’ll get there) which creates the frame for which the light of God disperses.

In the video game, Cyberpunk 2077, there is a technology called braindance where you can load memories from other humans and experience them as if they were yours. This concept so beautifully, if hauntingly, demonstrated in the game can be used as a philosophical exercise to help elucidate where your "true self" resides and it may not be where you think it is.

If your sense of self can be fooled -- as it is when the memories of others are loaded -- then your sense of self is not within the loaded memories -- which seems obvious to most. What is not obvious is that when you remove the braindance, the world you return to is still not you (we are pretending we are not talking about a video game here.)


Your own life is just another walking braindance waiting for someone else to load, so how can "you" be there? You have fooled yourself into thinking you are not just in another layer of the same dream. A braindance within a braindance within a braindance.

If you subtract the braindance from "your waking self", you find the false "identity" -- which is present in both places -- as a pure concept without the fetters of ego or contextual memory, which shows how this is "not you" but a weight or a fixation you have valued that keeps you trapped.

What happens when you become so enamored with the experience you forget you are dreaming/playing/have a headset on/can't see the mirror anymore/etc.? This leads to higher density/higher fixation realities and suffering.

You must understand that your paradigm — your interface to God — is highly personal to you. You are simply too complex to “share” interface so it is entirely up to you how to create it. No one else can do it for you. You can reach agreements or “contracts” with others to guide or assist, but they cannot make alterations to your interface — your soul, your DNA, and so on — although you may trick yourself into letting them.

And what a boring reality it would be if everyone had the same interface ... Hello, Borg?

Those who are weighted towards Nonsense are fundamentally investing in methods of false control born out of fear. Investing in control creates an environment that will control you because how else do you experience control? You have to break down -- fixate -- reality into pieces that are for the controller and the controlled. But this is a slippery slope.

The more you bear down, the more tension you create, the more you are pouring this false control into reality that creates a kind of control bloodhound that will hound you.

When one reaches the top of this pyramid (the bottom of the blackhole), the hound becomes a ravenous monster that must be fed all the time. If you ever stop feeding it, it will devour you and the pyramid will invert (this is to show you are staring in a mirror). This is your own will returning to you.
In the video game Amnesia: The Dark Descent, the protagonist chooses to remove his memories in an attempt to save himself from a darkness that is hounding him. Daniel, the protagonist, commits atrocities in order to abate the pursuit of the darkness. Amnesia is synonymous with reincarnation and the darkness is synonymous with your own will returning. Some call this "karma", but karma is simply consequences which are neither negative or positive. Amnesia is required when the darkness (the consequences or re-integration of will) is too much for you to handle.

Why is this important to acknowledge? Because you are in complete control of who you want to match to you.

The matchmaker is also often described as a “vibe.” This is a little closer, because vibe gives a good indication of your fixation level, which gives you a sense of how much will available to you. However, your feelings are still only tools to making decisions. They are SUGGESTIVE! Meaning, they have no power over your will (decision) making capability until you feed them.

It is the apparatus of understanding decisions, understanding that your reality is always done (your “imagination” could be considered the “true reality” whilst your Earthly experience is a buffered “delusion”) — recognizing the inbetween is suggestive Nonsense to ignore and “waiting for your will to catch up.” Creating a functional connection between these “places” that allows you to live a harmonious life requires skill.

The problem with vibe is that it could create what gamers sometimes call ELO Hell.

Elo hell (also known as MMR hell) is a video gaming term used in MOBAs and other multiplayer online games with competitive modes.[1] It refers to portions of the matchmaking ranking spectrum where individual matches are of poor quality, and are often determined by factors such as poor team coordination which are perceived to be outside the individual player’s control. This ostensibly makes it difficult for skilled players to “climb” up the matchmaking ranking (and out of Elo hell), due to the difficulty of consistently winning games under these conditions. Its existence in various games has been debated, and some game developers have called it an illusion caused by cognitive bias.[2]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elo_hell

In other words — if you believe vibe is the fundamental parameter for matchmaking, this would create a situation where you could trap yourself. If you became stuck with your vibe, such as with anger or resentment, you could fall into a kind of death spiral/loop from which you could not escape because the universe would constantly arrange people & scenarios to keep you there forever (because remember it is your will that just keeps going and going unless you shift it.) You could never change your “vibe.”

But this is not how this works. See my Groundhog’s Day article for additional information.

You can plug back into God at any time. You can give up the illusion that you are not in control by surrendering to the choices you already have coming to you. Deny your choices and you are simply creating more inversion because the light cannot be turned off.

Denial of choice is like trying to put your hand in front of a flashlight, then becoming upset when everything goes dark, while becoming indignant that there is a hand blocking out all the light, while forgetting it is your hand.

As you surrender back into your own will, your progress towards what I call “buffer reduction” is notable by how fixation (density) begins to decrease. It is measurable and can be felt, so you have an accurate barometer. Surrender often requires faith because it is not always pleasant.

You cannot willfully create a situation for yourself that does not have an “exit” even if you try because you cannot destroy yourself. You can continually victimize yourself — drive yourself into deeper levels of Hell (see last article) — until you wake up, but that is all. No one is doing this to you except yourself.

The deeper into hell you go (which is incoherence resulting in the denial of God — not vibe or frequency), the more fragmented you become. In other words, you will force yourself into “reincarnation” lives in order to handle the suffering you have brought upon yourself. You are splitting yourself in order to handle all the burden of playing out fixation.

True “hells” only exist within never-realized dreams, because even the most lost soul is not capable of torturing itself beyond a certain point (nothing can “reside” in suffering for long — as this represents the literal loss of soul-stability / coherence — without deciding to change its will as an animal-like reflex which begins to produce positive changes) and so would be pointless. “You” will make choices to minimize your suffering, because you can’t “not exist” — even if you are making incorrect choices — you will eventually get it right.

The best way to understand the matchmaker is that it works on your personal intentions and looks for other players who want to play with you. Do you have good intentions? Bad intentions? Deceptive intentions? Are you being honest with yourself? Do you know the lyrics to SWEET DREAMS by Eurythmics?

[Chorus]
Sweet dreams are made of this
Who am I to disagree?
I travel the world and the seven seas
Everybody’s looking for something

[Verse]
Some of them want to use you
Some of them want to get used by you
Some of them want to abuse you
Some of them want to be abused

Everyone is constantly arranging matches to satisfy their intentions. Everyone is casting for roles and we are fulfilling them without end. You have people coming your way you haven’t even met where everyone’s intentions are fulfilled without error.

Are you open to allowing? To receiving? Do you need to control the situation with an iron fist, or can you allow some potential, or unpredictability? Can you allow people to be? Are they potential lovers & allies, or are they potential enemies and adversaries? Are you guarded or vulnerable? These are all examples of subtle matchmaking parameters that affect your intentions beyond the obvious “I want a cake today.”

The physical apparently “seamless” reality you experience is completely irrelevant. You value the seamlessness, so you the world seems to go from one place to another without appearing like a jumbled dream — but it doesn’t. Time and space do not exist except as “feelings” which produce the effect. You are always within your own realm and it follows you wherever you go. Where are you when you dream? Certainly not still in your Earthly body except as the idea that you are that anchors you there.

Do you really believe that in a world as complex as this you shouldn’t have been killed by the smallest of details a thousand times over? You have. But those timelines are pointless to your soul’s development, but are also impossible because you cannot “live in death.” You can only fool yourself into pretending to be dead through more elaborate depictions of suffering & undeath quote “outside” unquote yourself and as pain.

If you cannot handle your suffering, you will “reincarnate” until you can reclaim your will and restore coherence. You will cast away any memory upon “death” that is too painful to give yourself breathing room when you are “born” again — but it will still return to you eventually.

I dislike the word reincarnate because really you are just creating a new dream reality with parameters you feel necessary to bringing you to your heart’s intentions / desires / the increased coherence of your soul.

Since we reject both frequency and vibe in favor of raw intention as the primary matchmaking parameter, then this forces us to realize some sobering truths. Since free will is absolute and will cannot conflict with another, then what happens when our intentions seem to intersect or violate the will of another?

Feelings are indicators of both the state of your own WAVE and who is intersecting or playing with you. Has anyone ever made you feel creepy, or scared? Don’t ignore those feelings. They are making a matchmaking request of you and asking if you would like to play with them. If you consent, then no will is violated, because you really are just agreeing to feed the experiences of creepiness and fear.

Does that example seem too obvious? Like don’t go down dark alleys?

Here is a simple way to think about it: Have you ever had these feelings when no one is around? That is still someone or someones making a matchmaking request of you. If you permit it, then you will be aligned to realities where you will meet these people, or create these feelings & experiences. You could be in the wilderness with no one around and still would be choosing what to experience. Not so obvious now, right?

These feelings do not need to be negative. In fact, we want to be highly selective of our most treasured feelings and cultivate these. Some of us value peace, others excitement — whatever you cultivate will be fundamental to how the matchmaker works for you.

The title of this site is EX INANIS which I have defined as meaning “leaving the inane”, or “leaving nonsense”, or creating from nothing. At the heart of EX INANIS is alchemy. What reality do you want to live in?

When you understand that your feelings may not be your own, don’t you have a responsibility — a duty — to protect the feelings that not only you value, but that are valuable to the Collective? To God? To protect what enriches life? If you do not protect God or life, why should God/life protect you? You are depriving it by your own omission to protect it, so it is taken from you as a free-will choice.

If you do not tolerate certain feelings within yourself because they destroy or consume life or expression, you implicitly are not tolerating them in others, either — and so these people are ejected from your reality by your own choice. See my vampirism article for a little bit about what can happen when people are ejected from your reality.

You say that sounds like vibe? But what I am telling you is not a up-and-down scale — where there is a “bad spectrum of vibes” and a “good spectrum of vibes.” You can pick and choose. When you understand vibes are suggestive, you can select whatever you want to cultivate like planting seeds. You can create unique signatures and impose these to create matchmaking parameters. This is why it is “intention” or a “bundle of decisions” not vibe.

But both vibe and frequently will not lead you wrong either and I encourage you to look into those systems.

I dislike vibe because it makes you a victim of your own prior choices ; confuses surrender with the idea that you have no input whatsoever. You are a gardener planting what you want to experience and then surrendering to the time it takes to grow. You are not a log thrown into a river, surrendering to whatever the river has in store for you. Of course, if we value life/experience, we cannot control all variables — but that takes us back to discussions about potential & determinism.

I love sunshowers. They are paradoxical. Warm & cold. Dark & light. It feels like peace to me — right in the middle. An exemplification of my philosophy. It is a unique mixture of states, isn’t it? Can you come up with creative feelings? I bet you can.

As I like to say, that is enough for now.