This is such a powerful question.
When you feel that doubt, or malaise, or that inner “zombie” creeping up on you ; when you feel like falling back into old patterns ; when you feel like you are wasting time or “shouldn’t be doing this” ; you should trigger yourself to remember this question: “What do you want?”
You heart will answer this question. And shortly there after you will look upon your Wave – your life – and you will know exactly how to get it. That’s Authenticity ; that’s you going “ping!” and the universe handing you a map.
Any pings after the first are bullshit.
Here’s where we all fuck up.
Nonsense wanders in and says: “Hey, you don’t need that map. Let me tell you how to get everything you want.”
Whatever layers of Nonsense you have within you will attempt to talk you out of it. The more you identify with your Nonsense or trust it (perhaps you have externalized some of it in the Other, family, friends, organizations, or perhaps “yesterday”), the more you believe your own bullshit.
Positive, negative, neutral … Nonsense will go to town to convince you that you can’t have what you want. Your job isn’t to decide what your heart wants. Your heart is the apex, the center, the crest – it is the precise intersection point between “everything you are.”
Your heart is the ultimate “fact of you.”
Nonsense will attempt to convince you that you need to compromise, or be realistic. Maybe, even, there are aspects of truth to that. Nonsense loves to sprinkle truth into its lies.
Nonsense will weave whatever convincing tale you need, because YOU are letting Nonsense borrow your consciousness. And what is “your consciousness”?
That’s right. You’ve left the door wide open to your imagination room, you dope.
And what are you? You are an aspect of God – perhaps God itself. It doesn’t matter. We don’t need to know. It’s irrelevant.
Through you, Nonsense becomes the master storyteller, because YOU are the master storyteller. But the story isn’t woven all at once. It is eternal – ongoing – right now.
Here’s another secret too: Nonsense KNOWS you know that you know that you know that it knows … you know.
Nonsense will trick you into thinking that, well … I’m the big bad storyteller, so whatever I say goes ; I can achieve my heart’s desires whilst totally ignoring all these other choices I made. Except all those other choices are the VERY FABRIC OF REALITY.
Inevitably, your mistake here will be thinking that the world, or other people aren’t “you” – or aren’t the perfect representation of you. Nonsense’s ultimate goal (or result) is to put you in the victim mindset. This creates entropy, or non-experience (yep – it creates “more of itself” because what it is a kind of error or chaos ; it needs no personification.)
Your opinions, judgments, evaluations ; the relationships ; the patterns of how you react ; whatever. Again, the difference is irrelevant. (Nonsense wants you to get caught into this trap of specifics.)
It is critical to understand that you are exactly where you have chosen to be. Whether you literally spawn the rest of the world out of nothing, or all the world(s) exist somewhere out there and you just “move there”, it doesn’t matter.
The thread that connects all of it together over and over and over is your free will. You are the ultimate creator or the ultimate traveler ; perhaps both ; who cares!
If your world doesn’t resemble the world your heart desires, then Nonsense is still there, whispering in your ear. Then you know the work isn’t done, so you ask again: “What do you want?”